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Philadelphia Yearly Meeting

of the Religious Society of Friends

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Ministry & Care

Stories of Faith on the Road to Easter

Written on: February 22, 2021

We are a people full of stories. Stories help us create meaning, make sense of our world, and develop identity. Stories are how some of the greatest teachers, including Jesus of Nazareth, shared their message and showed the path of a faithful life.

Over six weeks in February and March, a series of Godly Play and Faith & Play stories about the life and ministry of Jesus will be available for viewing with meeting communities or sharing at home. While the style of this storytelling is often associated with programs for children, we all need and yearn for stories. These are for all of us at any age. [Read more…] about Stories of Faith on the Road to Easter

Filed Under: Families, Ministry & Care, Philadelphia Yearly Meeting, Religious Education, Worship

Life in Prison as a Juvenile: Post Incarceration Stories Shared at Gwynedd

Written on: February 18, 2021


Deb Hejl, co-clerk of the Legislative Policy Collaborative, submitted the story below about healing circles at the Youth Sentencing and Reentry Project (YSOP). February is a good month to focus on our nation’s problems with incarceration, because there is still time to get informed and ready for FCNL’s Spring Lobbying Sessions.

The school to prison pipeline, and ongoing inequalities faced by persons of color within the policing and judicial systems are things our society must face. Behind the large problems, though, are human hearts and minds that bear witness to the impact on children who have been sentenced to prison for a ‘lifetime of punishment.’ [Read more…] about Life in Prison as a Juvenile: Post Incarceration Stories Shared at Gwynedd

Filed Under: Addressing Racism, Legislative Policy Collaborative, Ministry & Care, Peace & Social Justice, Philadelphia Yearly Meeting

Quakers in Education: Sarah Willie-LeBreton, Sociologist and Swarthmore Dean

Written on: February 18, 2021

To meet Sarah Willie-LeBreton, Ph.D. is to encounter an exceptionally grounded Friend with a deep knowledge of human societies. Currently Swarthmore College’s Provost and Dean of the Faculty since 2018, Sarah was appointed after having chaired the Department of Sociology & Anthropology (2009-2018), chaired the President’s Task Force on Sexual Misconduct (2013-14), served as Associate Provost (2005-8), and coordinated the Black Studies Program on and off for more than a decade beginning in 1998. Somehow, as she does all this, she has still found time to be present in leading PYM towards growth in important areas. [Read more…] about Quakers in Education: Sarah Willie-LeBreton, Sociologist and Swarthmore Dean

Filed Under: Addressing Racism, Annual Sessions, Faith & Practice, Famous Quakers, Governance & Stewardship, Ministry & Care, Philadelphia Yearly Meeting, Quaker History, Quakers & Quakerism

Quaker Traditions Series: Part II – Worship

Written on: February 11, 2021

This is part II in a series of four articles on Quaker Traditions. In his role as Associate Secretary for Religious Life,  Zachary Dutton has listened deeply to Friends in the community. Working with the PYM staff community engagement team he has provided answers to framing questions for this four-part series. The answers are reflective as opposed to definitive. [Read more…] about Quaker Traditions Series: Part II – Worship

Filed Under: Faith & Practice, Ministry & Care, Philadelphia Yearly Meeting, Quakers & Quakerism, Religious Education

About Hybrid Meetings: How They Work

Written on: February 10, 2021


Background

Back in the fall of 2020, two gatherings took place – one for monthly meeting leaders and another for quarterly meeting leaders. Worship during the pandemic was a big topic of discussion, so we had a follow up meeting on January 26, 2121 wherein we asked monthly and quarterly meetings to let us know who in their communities had experience with virtual and hybrid meetings. These are the notes from that meeting. [Read more…] about About Hybrid Meetings: How They Work

Filed Under: Communications & Outreach, Faith & Practice, Families, Ministry & Care, Pastoral Care, Philadelphia Yearly Meeting

Share Your Meeting’s Spiritual Self-Assessment

Written on: February 8, 2021

Dearest Friends in PYM Monthly and Quarterly Meetings and other PYM Quaker Groups,

We trust this finds you seeking to be grounded in Spirit and in your community of faith. 2020 has certainly been a year filled with both opportunities and challenges! The Ministry and Care Committee of Quaker Life Council is once again asking for your help as we look to better understand the spiritual state of our yearly meeting through this past year.

To accomplish this, we are asking meetings to consider responding to the following queries: [Read more…] about Share Your Meeting’s Spiritual Self-Assessment

Filed Under: Communications & Outreach, Faith & Practice, Ministry & Care, Pastoral Care, Peace & Social Justice, Philadelphia Yearly Meeting, Quaker Life Council, Quakers & Quakerism, Religious Education, State of the Meeting Report

Quaker Traditions Series: Part I – Spiritual Practice

Written on: February 3, 2021

The Quaker Traditions Series is a set of articles on the Quaker faith. In his role as Associate Secretary for Religious Life,  Zachary Dutton has listened deeply to Friends in the community. Working with the PYM staff community engagement team he has provided answers to framing questions for this four-part series. The answers are reflective as opposed to definitive.

The gift of the Quaker faith is that it is one of continuing revelation, so the article speaks to the ‘here and now’ of our faith even as it is tied to, and reflects, our history and tradition. If you have thoughts on these questions, please share them with Zachary – his email is at the end of this article. He is always looking for new ways to be in relationship with our wider Quaker community.

[Read more…] about Quaker Traditions Series: Part I – Spiritual Practice

Filed Under: Faith & Practice, Pastoral Care, Philadelphia Yearly Meeting, Quaker History

How Meetings Coped with a (Mostly) Virtual Christmas

Written on: January 21, 2021

As the nation welcomes new leadership in Washington, and our state health systems continue to confront Covid 19 with vaccine roll-outs, it’s important to celebrate what we have right at home: faith, connection, and fresh ideas.

This Christmas, PYM worship communities and meetings needed to reconsider exactly how to engage Friends in virtual or distanced Christmas celebrations. With the help of many people, including resources shared by PYM’s Youth Religious Life Coordinator, Melinda Wenner Bradley, Friends came up with the wonderful ideas shared below. [Read more…] about How Meetings Coped with a (Mostly) Virtual Christmas

Filed Under: Families, Ministry & Care, Philadelphia Yearly Meeting, Religious Education, Youth Programs

Pastoral Care for Our Children in These Times

Written on: January 8, 2021

As the pandemic continues, and this week our nation struggles once more against the legacy of racial injustice and violence, our children look on. 

Children and teens are experiencing the continued uncertainty of Covid and its impact on school, peer relationships, and future plans. Additionally, the events in Washington D.C. on January 6 were deeply disturbing and young people may feel anxiety, confusion, fear, sadness, or anger, and have questions about what they see and hear in the media and from friends. As parents, we’re holding space for our children’s feelings alongside our own anxiety, fury, and questions about moving forward. What follows are resources specifically for children, youth, and families.*


Where to Put Feelings

I was reminded by a Friend that worry dolls are a simple way to acknowledge children’s concerns and help them to find a place to put them. Sitting with a child while they share their worries, fears, and questions with the small doll and put it under their pillow at bedtime may not resolve the feelings, but it models healthy sharing and perspective.

Children need us to hear their concerns, and we can provide reassurance even if we do not have answers. Offering up our concerns in prayer is another way to acknowledge and place them in a larger “container” of our faith. This set of coloring pages “Prayers For When You Feel Anxious” includes both suggested prayers and three different sets of images for mindful coloring.

Young children cannot always articulate their feelings, and they may show us how they are feeling through play or behaviors. Sadness may look like: anger, tiredness, boredom, numbing out (often on screens), displaced frustration, resisting direction from adults. Their anxiety may show up as: anger, negativity, difficulty sleeping (particularly falling asleep), defiance, avoidance, lack of focus, over-planning, and chandeliering (“flying off the handle”). 

In her article, Five Things Kids Need in Order to Learn and Thrive During this Pandemic Year (linked below), Stephanie Malia Krauss names children’s need to:

  • Feel safe: physically and emotionally
  • Know what’s going on (within age-appropriate parameters)
  • Feel socially and emotionally connected
  • Have time, space, and support to learn and create
  • Feel loved and know they belong

Resources for Adults Supporting Children:

How To Talk To Kids About The Riots At The U.S. Capitol

Spiritual Practices for Use During a Traumatic News Event from Traci Smith

Five Things Kids Need in Order to Learn and Thrive During this Pandemic Year.

A Kids Book About Anxiety by Ross Szabo from the “A Kids Book About” series. The inside covers suggests, ”This book is best read together, grownup and kid.”

It’s Not Just Adults Who Are Stressed. Kids Are, Too. — Identifying your child’s emotional and behavioral reactions to stress is crucial, experts say, especially when anxieties are high.

COVID-19 Quarantine: an Emotional Tipping Point for Teens

“It’s okay to just be sad” from Courtney Martin and her blog, “the examined family.” 

“Coping with COVID-19: A Work Book for Kids and Teens” Designed to help children and teens communicate and cope with their feelings and emotions regarding the global Covid 19 pandemic. Includes writing and drawing prompts to help create a therapeutic experience and provide an opportunity to have open conversations. A good resource for pastoral care for young people (this resource does not touch on death or bereavement).


“Death feels closer”

There may be times in coming days when, in our experience as a meeting, or as a family, or as friends and neighbors, there is a child or young person dealing with loss. A research study published by Penn State University last summer concluded that every Covid-19 death leaves an average of nine survivors who have lost a grandparent, parent, sibling, spouse or child. Millions of Americans are in mourning for friends and relatives, co-workers and community members. 

Some of the more difficult conversations I’ve had in the past months with my own children have been about death. My college-aged child remarked during a conversation one day, “Death feels closer,”and has expressed anxiety about family and friends getting sick. A younger sibling has shown up at my bedside unable to sleep, and shared their deep uneasiness about the inevitability of death. “Darn existential questions!,” he tried to joke through tears.

As a parent, I hold my children close and provide what comfort I can. I’m glad for the Godly Play stories they heard and wondered about as younger children, which gave them images and language for big questions about the Divine and created spaces to come close to existential questions we all face about death and aloneness.

Thinking about how we talk about death and helping children develop a vocabulary for loss and grief is pastoral care preparation we can also do across ages in meeting communities. There are excellent resources for children through adolescents for talking about death and dying, that could be recommended to a family in need of support. In addition to this list of books about grief for young children through teens, the titles below are highly recommended. 

Suggested Books about Death and Grief:

Giants by A.E. McIntyre, illustrated by ElisaBeth Steines. A gentle treatment of a child’s grief story, written by a parent who lost their own parent as a young child.  Website for the book.

The Pear Tree A folktale retold by Luli Gray and illustrated by Madelyn Goodnight. Probably better for older children, the message is that death is a reality of life, but there is always hope.

Death Is Stupid by Anastasia Higginbotham is part of the “Ordinary Terrible Things” series. A realistic and moving read-along for a child and adult.

The Memory Tree by Britta Teckentrup is a story about remembering and letting go, and what remains — the forest animals lead the way.

A Little Blue Bottle by Jennifer Grant, illustrated by Gillian Whiting. Thinking about the sadness of losing a neighbor, and what our grief means to God. Includes a page, “Best Practices for When a Child Is Grieving.”

A Kids Book About Death by Taryn Schuelke from the “A Kids Book About” series. The inside covers suggests, ”This book is best read together, grownup and kid.”


*Pastoral Care for our Community during the COVID-19 Outbreak is another resource by my colleague George Schaefer, Care & Aging Coordinator. Adults seeking support can also reach out to the Friends Counseling Service.

Melinda Wenner Bradley, Youth Religious Life Coordinator mwennerbradley@pym.org. (My children gave their permission to be quoted in this piece.)

Filed Under: Counseling, Families, Friends Who Care For Youth, Ministry & Care, Pastoral Care, Philadelphia Yearly Meeting This article mentions:Children, Covid 19, Death, Families, Grief, Pastoral Care, Teens

Join Virtual Worship “Near” You

Written on: January 2, 2021

For Meetings Who Want to be “Found “ by Seekers Everywhere

Philadelphia Yearly Meeting is compiling monthly meeting virtual worship offerings to post online. If you are part of your meeting’s leadership team and your meeting has not yet filled out the worship and events survey there is still time to do so. Once you fill this out, we will get the information on your meeting’s page on the PYM website. This will help people find you.

Filed Under: Communications & Outreach, Ministry & Care, Monthly Meeting Management, Philadelphia Yearly Meeting, Quaker Life Council

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